How to Help Someone Else Permanently Block Porn on Their iPhone, With Their Consent

This is specifically about a situation where someone has come to you — a partner, a friend, someone you're close to — and asked for help locking down their own iPhone. Not monitoring someone who doesn't know, and not deciding this on their behalf. With their consent, from start to finish.

What "with consent" actually looks like

Real consent means they know exactly what's being set up, not just that something is.

Before touching their phone, they should understand the specific trade-off: once it's set up correctly, the restriction can't be undone by them on impulse for however long they've chosen. That's the entire value of doing it this way instead of relying on willpower alone — but it only holds up ethically if they agreed to that trade-off clearly, in advance, rather than finding out how firm it is later.

The setup itself is the same, just done together

Technically, nothing changes from the standard iPhone setup: Content & Privacy Restrictions, Limit Adult Websites, and turning off Screen Time Passcode Recovery so it can't be reset through their own Apple Account. The difference is who's in the room: they should see each step, know what's being turned on, and agree to the length of time before it's finalized.

Deciding who holds the passcode

If you set the passcode yourself and hold onto it, you become responsible for saying no if they ask for it back early — a role our piece on stopping a partner from handing back a passcode early covers in more depth. It's a real commitment, not a one-time favor.

A way to help without becoming the enforcer

ScreenVow lets you help someone get set up without either of you having to hold the passcode afterward — it generates and encrypts it directly, for the period they've agreed to, so there's no person left holding it who could later be talked into giving it back. See the step-by-step setup guide to walk through it together.